Tuesday, February 03, 2004
Not prepared …
Driving down to JB with my manager made me realize few things. Things which I had my doubts on, but never had the chance to confirm. For starters, I realized I’m way far from being a responsible person. This includes how I handle conflicts with my parents. My solution to any dispute with my parents would b to keep quite n let them believe that they can have it their way, which eventually leads to a bigger problem. Listening to the man speak about his family, his kids, he’s expectation of his kids n other stuff made me realize how strong u need to be, to become a leader, even though it’s just about managing a small family consisting of few person. I’m no where near from being a person, strong enough to make decision on behalf of people who I care for, which could have a big impact on them. Thinking about it now, I’ve always rode with the wave. Rarely have I made any big decision, except for my relationship. It’s always been, what good for others must be good for me as well. Ohhhh, such a dumbass. But I have changed, a lot. Relationship have thought me a thing or two. Though it was through the hard way, it was a lesson well learned. Maybe that’s y I always have this liking towards girls who r in control of situation, know what they want n ready to kickass if things r not goin their way.
With some of my aunties dropping hints that next in agenda should b me tying the knot, it scares me whenever I think about it. Each time I see this mean lady, I get totally freaked out. I’m wayyyy far from being in control of myself, how the heck u expect me to handle something that big. I still think, cartoons r cool n spend good amount of time watching them. So me n commitment r waaayyyy far apart. Wattt ??, tie the knot n get stuck for the rest of ur life? Well not me, at least not yet n not anytime soon.
Be in control, now that’s where I should be heading.
@ 7:39 PM
A new, brighter beginning, just like the sunflowers.
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Am on a journey through time, growing older with all the accumulated life lessons. With mind painted with wonderful sceneries from the journey of life. This is a place for me to sit back and unwind myself. Hoping this home in the virtual land will someday be a time capsule for me to run down memory lane.
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